Paparazzi Spies
by Shuichi Akai
Summary: We're the Paparazzi Spies and we're here to share stories about the sightings and private lives of the people of the One Piece World! [Starring "Rocky" and Blade] [Chapter 3: Wait, when did Mihawk become a dad?]
1. Crocodile the Animal Lover

**Paparazzi Spies**

 **Title:** Paparazzi Spies  
 **Rating:** T  
 **Fandom:** One Piece  
 **Summary:** We're the Paparazzi Spies and we're here to share stories about the sightings and private lives of the people of the One Piece World! [Chapter 1: Crocodile holds an umbrella over a shivering puppy in the rain!?]

* * *

 **Chapter 1: Crocodile the Animal Lover**

A young girl around seventeen years old was walking through an alley, fiddling with her camera. "Geez, if I don't get a good photos and a great story soon, I'm gonna starve," She whined, running a hand through her long red hair. She felt something wet and wiped the top of her nose. There was another drip followed by even more. She looked up to the sky to see large rain clouds. "You've got to be kidding me!"

It began to drizzle and then soon it got heavier with each second, turning into an all-out pour. The girl scrambled under a store's awning, rainwater dripping from her soaked clothes. "Damn it!" She cursed. She quickly checked her camera, taking out some napkins to wipe away the water. She sighed in relief as it turned on. "At least it's still working,"

A soft whimper caught her attention and she turned to the streets. A lonely little pug puppy was walking down the street, shivering in the rain. "Poor thing," The girl said. Then she caught sight of Sir Crocodile approaching the puppy, an opened umbrella in hand. "Oh no! That dirty pirate better not—"

Then something unexpected happened. Crocodile stopped beside the puppy and held the umbrella over the pug. The girl rubbed her gold eyes to see if she was just imagining things. Nope, Crocodile was still there, holding his umbrella over a puppy. She then pinched herself to see if she was in a dream. Nope, it was real. Positioning her camera, she took multiple quick pictures. She had to be very careful to leave the flash off or else Crocodile would know of her presence and certainly kill her.

However, Crocodile had already known she was there, but couldn't do anything. He was unable to turn to sand due to being wet and the weather still being rainy. If he were to charge towards her, he'd have to drop his umbrella which would cause the pup to be in the rain again. He was thinking of chasing after her when the weather was cleared up, but he couldn't see her face from this angle.

The girl quickly ran in the direction of the closest newspaper company. "This will surely get me enough cash for food and a room!"

XXX

 **Sir Crocodile holds an umbrella over a shivering puppy in the rain!?**

 _On April 1_ _st_ _, XXXX there was heavy rain throughout most of the day. Most people would usually be using an umbrella to shield their selves from the wet weather, but one shocking person decided to protect a puppy from the rain instead of himself. Who is this shocking person you might ask?_

 _It's none other than Sir Crocodile, former Hero of Alabasta and former Shichibukai!_

 _Sir Crocodile has eaten a Logia Devil Fruit known as the Sand-Sand Fruit. It allows the user to manipulate sand as well as turn parts of their body into sand. However, there are two ways to counteract the ability while fighting. The first is through Armament Haki of course. The second is by either wetting him or having your weapon soaked._

 _That means that Sir Crocodile was allowing himself to be weakened in order to protect the stray pug! Who knew such a cruel man that has killed many and had tried to take over Alabasta actually had a warm heart and was an animal-lover? What's also been noted is the drastic decrease in stray animals ever since Sir Crocodile arrived here at Nazo. Could he be responsible for this and be secretly caring for them?_

"Preposterous! I was merely showing that puppy that I had the power to choose whether it stayed under the rain or under my umbrella!" Sir Crocodile used his Devil Fruit to dry the newspaper up and turn it to dust. He then picked up said pug and petted his fur. "I am not responsible for the decrease in stray animals, right Daz?"

Daz only folded his arms up and said nothing, staring back at Crocodile.

"What?" Crocodile asked.

Inside their ship were a bunch of dogs, cats, lizards, and Bananawani.

XXX

"Yes!" The girl cheered, holding her bag of beri. "I made so much from that news article and the pictures!"

A cloaked figure approached her. "You were the ones to submit that?"

"Yep!" The girl grinned.

"I'm a member of Paparazzi Spies," The figure said. "To catch such a photo without being killed is not an easy task. I would like to offer you a job,"

"No way!" The girl exclaimed. "Paparazzi Spies is one of themost famous newspaper companies!"

"So what do you say?" The figure asked.

"Hell yeah!" The girl held out her hand. "The name's Blade,"

* * *

 **Send as many requests as you want! All you gotta do is state which character and what you want the news article to be about.**

 **EXAMPLE:  
Name: **Sir Crocodile  
 **Subject:** He is holding an umbrella over a shivering puppy in the rain. Based on the cover page of Chapter 860.


	2. Boa Hancock's Palace Portrait

**Paparazzi Spies**

 **Title:** Paparazzi Spies  
 **Rating:** T  
 **Fandom:** One Piece  
 **Summary:** We're the Paparazzi Spies and we're here to share stories about the sightings and private lives of the people of the One Piece World! [Chapter 2: Why the hell does Boa Hancock have a giant portrait of Straw Hat Luffy on her palace!?]

* * *

 **Chapter 2: Boa Hancock's Palace Portrait**

"My name is Rocky," A tall blonde haired man greeted Blade. He wore a cloak as well as a bird mask, concealing his face completely. "I was told that you were going to be my partner from now on?" He offered a handshake.

"The name's Blade," Blade introduced herself and accepted the handshake. "Do we have a mission?"

"Yeah," Rocky nodded.

"Wow, I just joined yesterday and I already get a mission!" Blade exclaimed. "Guess Paparazzi Spies are constantly busy, huh?"

Rocky chuckled. "We can't slack off if we want to get the news before everyone else,"

"So what's our mission?" Blade asked.

"There's been rumors that the Shichibukai Boa Hancock has a giant portrait of Monkey D. Luffy on her palace," Rocky informed. "We need to infiltrate Amazon Lily to see if it is true. The ship is ready," He started to walk to the shore and ended up tripping.

"Are you alright?"

"Yeah," Rocky held up a piece sign.

Rocky had tripped multiple times before they had gotten to the ship. Blade had stopped asking if he was alright after the third time. A small ship was at the dock and they started to set sail. A few minutes later, Rocky lit his cigarette…the flame enveloping his shoulder. "Rocky!" Blade dumped a bucket of water on him.

"Ah, thanks," Rocky chuckled. "Sometimes I set my shoulder on fire when lighting my cigarette,"

"You're just a big klutz, aren't you?" Blade sighed.

"I'm not clumsy!"

XXX

"I can't go any closer than this," Rocky stopped the ship.

"Why not?" Blade asked.

"Amazon Lily," Rocky pointed out. "No men are allowed or we'll be killed and I very much want to stay alive,"

"Hmm," Blade thought for a moment. "Let's disguise you!"

XXX

Blade and a "woman" with lipstick, eyeshadow, a long pink dress, and high heels. The woman wore a bird mask, concealing her upper face. The women of Amazon Lily immediately were alert. "Who are you?"

"I am Blade," Blade introduced. "This is my sister, Roca,"

"Hello," Rocky/Roca forced himself to speak in a high voice. "I'm Roca,"

"What business do you have here?" They demanded.

"We're from Paparazzi Spies and we're here to interview Boa Hancock," Blade said. "We heard that there was a giant portrait of Monkey D. Luffy on her palace?"

XXX

"Are you two the women who wish to see me?" Boa asked.

"Yes," Blade nodded.

"Speak," Boa ordered.

"We heard that there was a giant portrait of Monkey D. Luffy on your palace," Blade said. "We'd like to interview you about it,"

Boa's eyes narrowed. "You're not thinking of stealing _my_ Luffy, right!?"

"O-Of course not!" Roca waved her arms frantically. However, the motion caused the watermelon in her shirts to fall out.

The women of Amazon Lily gasped. "A _man_!?"

 _'Oh crap! Oh crap!'_ Rocky thought. He decided to continue the act and sighed. "You are wrong, I am not a man!"

"Why the hell would you put watermelons in your shirt!?"

"Because…" Rocky forced himself to create tears. "I am flat-chested unlike you women! I feel so embarrassed! My secret is out!"

A few of the Amazon Lily women patted Rocky's shoulder and back. "It's alright. There's nothing wrong with you. You're a beautiful woman like all of us,"

Rocky tried his best to not blush but he ended up having pink dust his cheeks. _'It worked!'_

"However I am the most beautiful woman in the world!" Boa declared.

XXX

 **Boa Hancock has a giant portrait of Monkey D. Luffy!?**

 _On April 14, XXXX Paparazzi Spies Rocky and Blade sailed out to Amazon Lily, somehow making it there on the same day despite being miles away. They met up with the Pirate Empress Boa Hancock and interviewed her. This is how the interview went._

 _"Why do you have a palace-size poster of Monkey D. Luffy hanging on the wall of your palace?" Blade asked._

 _"I don't have a palace-size poster of Luffy!" Boa denied._

 _"But we're staring at it right now," Rocky said._

 _"I have a_ hundred _palace-size posters of Luffy!"_

 _"…Oh…So why do you have a hundred of them?" Blade questioned._

 _"Because Luffy and I are going to be married!" Boa shouted. "YOU HEAR THAT!? ANY WOMEN WHO TOUCHES_ MY _LUFFY WILL BE TORTURED IN THE MOST PAINFUL WAYS POSSIBLE BEFORE SUFFERING A BRUTAL MURDER AT MY HANDS!"_

 _"Hancock give back the Den-Den Mushi!" Blade tried to take the snail back but was overpowered. "Rocky—I mean Roca! Don't just stand there! Help me!"_

 _"You do realize that we could edit out some parts when we actually type out the news article, right?" Rocky asked. "I mean, we're just recording for reference. We'll type the actual article later on,"_

 _There you have it folks! There actually is a portrait of Straw Hat Luffy on her palace. But remember, do not try to steal Luffy's heart. Hancock will kill you._

 _"HOW DARE YOU SPEAK MY LUFFY'S NAME WITHOUT HONORIFICS!?"_

"Why the hell is Boa Hancock still a Shichibukai!?" Akainu demanded, glaring at the Gorosei. "She literally admitted that she wants to marry Straw Hat!"

"But she's still so beautiful and cute," The Gorosei said, staring at the photos of Boa Hancock. They were even drooling over her!

Akainu face palmed himself. "I'm surrounded by idiots…"

* * *

 **I'm pretty sure you all know who Rocky is. I tried to stop myself, but he ended up in the story.**

 **Can someone give me a prompt with Doflamingo? Remember, this is BEFORE his downfall.**


	3. Papa Mihawk

**Paparazzi Spies**

 **Title:** Paparazzi Spies  
 **Rating:** T  
 **Fandom:** One Piece  
 **Summary:** We're the Paparazzi Spies and we're here to share stories about the sightings and private lives of the people of the One Piece World! [Chapter 3: Wait, when did Mihawk become a dad!?]

* * *

 **Chapter 3: Papa Mihawk**

On their way back to Paparazzi Spies Headquarters, Rocky and Blade had stopped by an island to restock. It was a small island known as Taka Island. After restocking, they overheard the gossip and rumors the townspeople were spreading. Immediately, Rocky and Blade knew it was another newspaper topic.

"So what's all this chatting all about?" Rocky asked the bartender.

"One of the Shichibukai, Dracule 'Hawk Eyes' Mihawk, is in town," The bartender explained. "And he's a father!"

That caught their attention. "Hawk Eyes is a father!?"

"Yeah!" The bartender nodded. "He's got two kids, a four year old daughter and an infant son!"

"No way," Blade said. "Are you sure it's Dracule Mihawk?"

"Those eyes were unmistakably Hawk Eyes,"

XXX

Rocky and Blade caught sight of Mihawk in a clothing store, specifically in the kids' and babies' clothes aisle. Carefully staying out of view, they kept watch of the Shichibukai.

"No! Daddy that dress isn't cute enough!" Perona whined when Mihawk held up a dress to show to her.

"Then hurry and choose your dresses," Mihawk said calmly, although everyone could tell that he was starting to lose his patience with the girl.

"I don't like any of these dresses!" Perona stomped her feet.

"Perona, this is the _fifth_ clothes shop I took you to," Mihawk reminded.

"I don't want any of these!" Perona screamed.

"Perona," Mihawk's tone was now firm. "I will not tolerate this kind of attitude any longer,"

"Negative Hollow!"

To both of the reporters' shock, Mihawk slumped to the ground. "I wish that I was a leech…"

While Rocky was taking a photo of a depressed Mihawk, Blade noticed Mihawk's son. "Hey Rocky, Mihawk's baby is crawling away," Blade snapped some pictures of the green haired infant separating from Mihawk and Perona.

"We should follow him to make sure he doesn't get hurt," Rocky suggested.

"You think Mihawk's gonna be alright?" Blade asked.

"I'm sure the effects of the Hollow-Hollow Fruit will wear off eventually," Rocky assured.

XXX

Rocky and Blade followed Zoro around town. When Zoro finally stopped, they noticed that he was staring at a weapon shop, a very expensive sword displayed in the shop window. Zoro started to head towards the shop…and then for some reason he turned right.

"Uh…he was looking at the sword on display, right?" Rocky asked.

"Maybe he was looking somewhere else?" Blade shrugged. "I mean, the weapon shop was literally straight across from him. It's not like he could get lost, right?"

They continued to follow Zoro as he made twists and turns. Confusion and frustration was evident on his facial expression. After two hours, Zoro arrived at the front of the shop with happiness now replacing the confusion and frustration.

"Okay, I take back about what I said about him not getting lost earlier," Blade said.

As Zoro was about to enter, Mihawk picked him up. "There you are Zoro. I told you not to wander off or else you'd get lost,"

"Naw wost!" Zoro claimed. "Shup moob awound. Oo wost,"

"Buildings do not move, Zoro," Mihawk corrected him. "I have been coming to this island for years and I have memorized the layout," He held up multiple bags on his opposite arm. "I have bought Perona every single one of the dresses in the shop so we would be able to leave,"

"And a teddy bear!" Perona held up her new stuffed animal. "He's cuter than any of you ever will be,"

Mihawk groaned. "I am going to hunt down that Jewelry Bonney to get her to turn you both back to normal,"

XXX

 _ **Dracule Mihawk is a Wonderful Father!?**_

 _Yes folk, your eyes haven't deceived you! Mihawk is indeed a father of two kids!_

 _While restocking at Taka Island, rumors have been spreading about Dracule Mihawk's new role as a father._

 _Hawk Eyes has two children. One is a four year old girl with long, curly, pink hair and large black eyes. His other child is a boy, his infant son with short green hair. His hair color reminds people of green moss._

 _His daughter seems to have eaten a Devil Fruit, the Hollow-Hollow Fruit. While shopping for dresses, Mihawk was hit with a Negative Hollow and claimed to want to be a leech. His son also seems to be a bit directionally challenge, getting lost when his destination was literally across from him._

Mihawk scowled as he realized that the image used was him on his knees. Zoro was sitting on his lap and had also seen the paper. "I naw diwecktinwy chawensh!"


End file.
